Wade in the water

Both literally and figuratively.

A little bummed the rain came back. ugh. I guess I should be glad we're not in drought mode anymore. Out in California they are enjoying the lovely Santa Ana winds. If I were there, my hair would look real good about now.

Also, can I just say, my feelings are a tad hurt that gas has gone back up 30 cents? I know I should be thinking, well at least it's still in the $1.60's. But..I guess my underlying fear is what if it creeps all the way back up to the $4's?

Wading in the water figuratively too...getting my feet wet....with a little class at Jeff State called Human Anatomy and Physiology 1, aka, Biology 201. hmmmm....you ask why? well, to see if I want to get into the nursing program. Long story short, a bunch of what ifs got answered, and so now getting my feet wet is a good idea. If I (that is, we--Frank is taking the class too), do well, then we should be on track to apply for nursing school next spring.

So, madly trying to memorize medical/latin prefix/vocab words for Tuesday's quiz--which, surprisingly enough, are easier than I thought. About half of them actually make sense, such as, aqua--water, calor--heat, cardi--heart, etc. Had our first class and lab on Thursday, and it was actually kinda fun. Anatomy seems to be more interesting than regular old h/s biology. I guess I wasn't really into all the plants and stuff. The only thing that will be intimidating is the microscope stuff. Identifying specimens under a microscope is scary and intimidating...especially since everything looks the same! Heather is very encouraging though, and says that we'll get it, not to worry. um. yeah. ok.

I'll let you know how we do.

Doing ok with the grief thing. It comes and goes. I'm sure it would be even worse if I'd lost an 'already born' child or my husband. Every day has sad and happy moments. I appreciate my family more and am striving to show them in tangible ways. I am trying to be more patient and caring with the kids--and every day has its struggles, but they are much more precious to me since losing the baby. You never know how long you will be able to savor being with the people you love--enjoy it.
Having a real problem sleeping. The day is fine--staying busy is easy. But I lie down at night to sleep and my mind won't shut off. Rebecca warned me about that. Pray if you think about it. Laura recommended soothing music and promised to bring me some. I will try it.
Still have a hard time seeing a pregnant person or a baby. It's an instant physical reaction, a twisting in my gut; of sadness and grief. Today in Walmart, I walked by the baby section (accidentally) and saw the car seats on display. Immediately I was sad, because we'd planned to get a new car seat because our old one was too old. So, the moments come and go. Every day gets a tiny bit easier, and I can see more measurable progress every week. I'm sure it'll always be a poignant subject for me.
But if you are pregnant or have a small baby, don't be feel bad! I still love you. It's just a sad moment for me.

Went back to work this week. I'd considered taking the week off, but felt up to it when the time came. It was good, but draining. I was glad when Saturday got here!

Got some good study time in for the class today, and it just feels weird to be taking a class 6 years after college. I worry if I've still "got it". we'll see.

Leaving you with a verse that brings comfort to me. "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."